December 12, 2024
I tried to disqualify myself.
I rattled off all the reasons in my head as to why I couldn’t or shouldn’t participate.
I even listed reasons other people would have -
they were my made up reasons of course, but I was totally buying in.
Sometimes saying yes is scary.
Sometimes saying no is.
Sometimes decision making in general is terrifying, bothersome, inconvenient, or time consuming.
“What if I make the wrong choice?”
That is a frequent recurring question in my head (and a total Enneagram 1 response).
I also reach out for the opinions of others so I don’t miss some wise insight or valuable perspective before deciding. Fortunately, I am blessed to have people who are willing to come alongside to help me find my “right” answer.
In my decision making, I was paralyzed to make a choice because of fear.
Fear I would get pushback or ridiculed because others would think it wasn’t the right choice.
Fear there was a better option and somehow I missed it.
Is there something slowing you down from making a decision or taking action?
Fear for x, y, and z reasons.
The feeling of unworthiness.
The reconciliation of logistics.
Responsibilities that do not belong to you, yet you carry them.
Full schedules, carpool, health concerns, kid activities, work deadlines.
What is it for you?
Interestingly, the Core Motivations of our Enneagram Type can come into play here.
Here is what each type might be concerned about…
Type 1s - making the right decision
Type 2s - some people becoming upset with their decision
Type 3s - the fastest and most efficient choice
Type 4s - pondering the options and checking in with their heart
Type 5s - the data and having all the facts
Type 6s - the risks involved
Type 7s - having a variety of choices so the fun can be filtered from the mundane
Type 8s - wasting time (they probably already made a gut decision)
Type 9s - taking it slow and considering everyone's opinions
The average adult makes 35,000 decisions in a day - that is no small feat.
Understanding some of the nuances that might be at play in the process can be a superpower.
I have found it so helpful to know parts of my Core Motivations and how they influence my decision making. Knowing my Enneagram type allows me to easily recognize when my Core Fears are getting activated. With this awareness, I can acknowledge the fear and refocus with a realistic approach.
Funny thing…when we trust the outcome to God,
there isn’t a wrong decision,
a choice too risky,
an option lacking heart or information,
or a conclusion too slow.
He is ultimately in control and His plans will not be thwarted, regardless of the decisions any human makes or the process they take to get there - He gets the final approval or veto vote.
It is fun to discover the motivations within us.
It can even launch us into “ah-hah” moments.
If you’re curious, let us help you determine your type.
Does a decision have you in a stall pattern before you get to your final answer?
Are you still at the same step you were days ago and can’t figure out why you’re not moving forward?
I encourage you to get curious!
Look at the possible responses of the 9 Types above and see which resonate with you. Identifying which Core Motivations reflect you are a really good indicator of your Enneagram Type in some shape or form.
Check our Core Motivations Guidesheet if you want to explore the Core Desire, Weakness, and Longing of all 9 Types.
And please remember, when you’re looking for wisdom in the decision making process, God has all the answers, all we need to do is ask for His assistance (James 1:5).
Joining together in the process,
Katie {and Kristan}
James 1:5 “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.”